DAY 8: SAVOURING A MOMENT

HOW DID IT FEEL TO HAVE YOUR EYES CLOSED IN A SELFIE?

How did it feel for you to NOT look into the camera? For some people, we may feel more engaged with ourselves through the lens when we look into it. Or as you might find through this activity, closing our eyes actually allows ourselves to feel more connected to ourselves in the moment we take the photo. How did it feel for you to try this today (and there is no right or wrong answer...this is just for you to reflect on and your experience is 100% valid no matter what it is).

From June 8, 2022: sometimes it feels more #satisfying for me #personally to not look into the lens of my #camera when taking a #selfportrait.

ESPECIALLY AFTER LOOKING DIRECTLY INTO THE LENS YESTERDAY, WAS YOUR INNER CRITIC A BIT MORE GENTLE IN ONE OF THESE TYPES OF SELFIES?

Today, I found a spot where I could just be connected with my surroundings, in the #present moment, #nonjudgmentally, not worrying too much about the #troubles that seem to follow me in #life. My eyes #soaked in the colours of the #wildflowers, and traced the movements of #bees floating through the air, from #flower to flower, #petal to petal, ever so #effortlessly. I felt a slight #breeze caressing my skin but also the warmth of the #sun beaming down. Overall, when I pause to close my eyes in these moments, I’m almost shutting down my ability to criticize myself… I’ll even move my #camera around to capture different angles while my eyes stay closed, although I admit that my monkey mind can wander to questions like “…are you sure you’re in frame or not Steve?” or “…are you sure it’s tack sharp Steve?” And I won’t kid myself by denying that my critic is always fast to scroll through the photos on my digital camera’s screen when I’ve stopped taking photos and opened my eyes again.

Let's reflect on today as well as yesterday's activity. Which felt more comfortable to you? Which felt like there was more ease to it. Did you inner critic rise up for one of them or both of them? Remember...your inner critic rising up isn't a bad thing. In fact, it's probably a sign that you're going out of your comfort zone and that this is an activity that you definitely should try (and not listen to the critic). Hear it out and then ask it to trust you and try the activity anyways. So, after doing that...how did these two eye-focused activities go for you?

Yesterday, I took #selfie #photos of myself looking directly into the lens of my camera. And I think in that moment, that was harder to do as I’m not looking at a viewfinder, or other digital display to see how I’m #positioned. My eyes are open but for a moment, I’m still blind.

I won’t lie that I’m stressed today still. But for a moment I wasn’t. For a moment I breathed. An hour after this was shot, I’d be on the phone for my first counselling appointment in almost a year. And it was good. Tomorrow, my annual physical exam takes place.

159/365.