DAY 1: TAKING THE FIRST STEP
WHAT ARE YOU HOPING FOR IN THE JOURNEY AHEAD THIS MONTH?
As we begin this month of opening up to seeing ourselves with kindness through our cameras, what are you hoping for?
May 1, 2022: So. It’s May 1, 2022. It’s been two months now since I declared on March 1 that I was embarking on a new journey of self #reflection, self exploration, and #selflove. I wrote about wanting to #connect more deeply with myself as an individual, as I try to overcome the #depression which has paralyzed me for too long now. It was a part of a month long challenge I had enrolled in which was to have taken place in February 2022. But I only made it three days into the challenge before I started falling behind and I failed at it. Again.
Since March 3, I’ve only posted about ten #selfies. For all of 2022, only around seventeen selfies. 17 out of 120 days that have already passed in 2022. My monkey mind gets negative with myself when I can’t even achieve something I’ve wanted to do daily now since January 1, 2020. It seems indicative of my inability to commit to things, even things I want to think I’m genuinely interested in.
I’ve also watched my engagement on @Instagram plummet this year, & I saw my @500px fine art #photography account get banned. So it also makes my monkey mind natter away at me about why do I even bother making #art if nobody gives a shit about it? But maybe it draws back to me not being consistent... If I don’t put the effort into making the work, why should anyone put in the effort to follow, like, share, & comment on it?
What would you love to feel in this experience? Are there certain types of selfies you hope to capture?
On March 1, I also declared that when I get into a funk, I’m going to try and look at it more positively, which I know is not at all easy to do. And I did that sometimes. First, I made a plan to salvage part of my semester @kwantlenu, & it could of the three courses I stayed enrolled in, I might end up with three A+ grades. Then, I made a plan to get certain certifications completed in areas that might help me secure work come summer: film industry orientation and safety, first aid, food safety, traffic control, and WHMIS among others… so I have options.
IT CAN BE POWERFUL TO GIVE VOICE TO WHAT WE'RE NERVOUS OR FEARFUL OF TOO. WHAT FEARS OR WORRIES ARE ON YOUR MIND? By giving them space to be heard and knowing that they might come up again, it can help us begin to diffuse their power over us!
On March 1st I also mentioned how I’m too quick to jump online & moan about the state of my life, & the majority of my selfies since then have done just that. I guess one things clear this May 1st… I I still have a lot of work to do.
121/365.
This was originally posted on Instagram and Flickr.
Today’s photo prompt and reflective journaling questions for today was a part of the BE YOUR OWN BELOVED photo workshop challenge which is run several times throughout the year by photographer VIVIENNE McMASTER. It’s well worth signing up for, and doing alongside other participants.
HAVE YOU TAKEN YOUR PHOTO ALREADY? IF NOT...ARE YOU FEELING RESISTANT? IF SO, IT'S TOTALLY OKAY AND LET'S EXPLORE WHY!
You might fine that with this or any prompt, you feel resistant. That is totally okay and it can actually be a really good thing as it's a sign that there is change ahead. Your inner critic doesn't want you to change and it works really hard to prevent that. So when we feel that resistant feeling it's usually a sign that we SHOULD do it, no matter what our inner critic says. So let's compassionately and playfully step into our resistance to a prompt, keep going...keep trying. Out past our resistance is our realizations!
Plus, we're on Day 1 of a class, beginning a process of taking a photo every day! Today is about creating that motion in the process and this space it to let yourself acknowledge the resistance and see what happens next!
#beyourownbeloved #beyourownbeloved💖 #depressionhelp #depressionawareness #startingover #selflove #selflovejourney #selflove #dailyselfie #dailywriting #subvertedselfies #subvertedselfie #art #photography #photo #feet #heels #scar #pjamabottoms #legs #pjamas #towels #tiles #cupboards #dog #bathroom #walkingaway #selfloveisnotselfish #sad #depressed