July 1, 2022 Subverted Selfie Project Post (Be Your Own Beloved Edition)

DAY  1:  TAKING  THE  FIRST  STEP

WHAT  ARE  YOU  HOPING  FOR  IN  THE  JOURNEY  AHEAD  THIS  MONTH?

As  we begin  this  month  of  opening  up  to  seeing  ourselves  with  kindness  through  our  cameras,  what  are you  hoping  for?

July 1, 2022: This is going to mark my fourth attempt at getting through this #beyourownbeloved #challenge. I don’t want to beat myself up again after only making it only three days in back in March, four days in May and eleven days in June. I got bogged down with finishing my condensed #ArtHistory of Urban, #Graffiti and #StreetArt course I took. I actually finished the course, but only with a B-. The new #antidepressant and #antianxiety #medication I’m on just knocks me out so much. Even when I stopped the #anxiety medication for a week I was still out of it, and had troubles finishing my final project: I needed more time but had none, and I failed the final project as a result. Which sucks as I was sitting at an A/A+ heading into the final project. I’m still going to finish it though, as my project focussed on #MentalHealth and #depression, a conversation I think is so important to have.

I’ve talked a lot about my battle with depression. It feeds my bad eating habits. Even right now as I write this, I want to go to this nearby #cafe and gorge myself on a cinnamon sugar brioche, a chocolate chip cookie, and a large hot chocolate. But I’m not going to do that as I’ve been fasting for 24 hours, drinking just water in preparation for my first hydrocolonic therapy session at @inner.garden.health. I thought my first session was last week, and I had faster then as well, which I don’t regret. The last two weeks I’ve been more #mindful of what I consume.

What  would  you  love  to  feel  in  this  experience?  Are  there  certain  types  of  selfies  you hope  to  capture?

So, again I start another day wanting to feel more #positive about myself. I want to #raise my #vibration. I want to breathe in being alive. I’m not going to dwell on how many times I’ve said this in the past. It’s time to just let it 🐝.

This photo originally appeared on Instagram and Flickr.

182/365.

IT  CAN  BE  POWERFUL  TO  GIVE  VOICE  TO  WHAT  WE'RE  NERVOUS  OR FEARFUL  OF  TOO.  WHAT  FEARS  OR  WORRIES  ARE  ON  YOUR  MIND? By  giving  them  space  to  be  heard  and  knowing  that  they  might  come  up  again,  it  can  help  us  begin  to diffuse  their  power  over  us!

HAVE  YOU  TAKEN  YOUR  PHOTO  ALREADY?  IF  NOT...ARE  YOU  FEELING RESISTANT?  IF  SO,  IT'S  TOTALLY  OKAY  AND  LET'S  EXPLORE  WHY!

You  might  fine  that  with  this  or  any  prompt,  you  feel  resistant.  That  is  totally  okay  and  it  can  actually  be  a really  good  thing  as  it's  a  sign  that  there  is  change  ahead.  Your  inner  critic  doesn't  want  you  to  change and  it  works  really  hard  to  prevent  that.  So  when  we  feel  that  resistant  feeling  it's  usually  a  sign  that  we SHOULD do it,  no  matter  what  our  inner  critic  says.  So  let's  compassionately  and  playfully  step  into  our resistance  to  a  prompt,  keep  going...keep  trying.  Out  past  our  resistance  is  our  realizations!

Plus,  we're  on  Day  1  of  a  class,  beginning  a  process  of  taking  a  photo  every  day!  Today  is  about  creating that  motion  in  the  process  and  this  space  it  to  let  yourself  acknowledge  the  resistance  and  see  what happens  next!

#beyourownbeloved #beyourownbeloved💖 #depressionawareness #startingover #selflovejourney #dailyselfie #dailywriting #art #photography #feet #heels #scar #legs #socks #tattoo

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Today’s photo prompt and reflective journaling questions for today was a part of the BE YOUR OWN BELOVED photo workshop challenge which is run several times throughout the year by photographer VIVIENNE McMASTER. It’s well worth signing up for, and doing alongside other participants. Note that there’s no requirement to share your photos outside of the group. You don’t even have to share the writing reflections with the group, let alone publicly as I do. It’s a very supportive and private safe space that McMaster provides.

@beyouroewnbeloved @beyourownbelovedportraits